Today

I got pulled over for doing 65 in a 40 zone. That's bad. I also forgot all my paperwork on my desk, and am still using a licence that expired in '05. THEN after I got pulled over I shot a small monkey. Was a bad move. Any clue what assault charges against exotic animals is? So the guy wrote me up for going 19 over so I could go to traffic school and as this is going on, my phone rings and it's my sister, whose car this recently was, and who just happened to be an officer on duty in that area, hearing her former licence plate # read over the radio. "Hello?" "Where are you right now?!"...Well, as luck would have it my sis is cool, and I told her what I'd done, and that I was in the wrong, and she's like "Okay, call me afterwards." I called her, she somehow audibly shook her head, and then shows up at my work like 30 minutes later, "Rodney, you've got a police officer here to see you?", and lets me know she talked to the guy and I got a warning ticket. A WARNING TICKET for going 25 over? No frickin, AWESOME! Now, I just gotta make sure my insurance is still good, renew my registration before it expires, apparently I should carry a current licence, and I'm gonna be my sisters indentured servant babysitter for a bit. Oh well, they're good kids. And the officer says monkeys make a good stew, so I didn't have to worry about that.